Conversations in our house are strange. Which is why my husband is awesome. Today I figured I’d give you a sneak peek into Jenville (I know, you’re excited).
Me: Would you catch stars with me?
Hubs: Why the hell would I want to catch stars?
Me: Lucky dust. *gives the ‘duh’ stare*
Hubs: How lucky?
Me: I can’t guarantee it will win us the lottery. (Answering the question he didn’t ask, but wanted too).
Hubs: Then no.
Me: Why not? You’re not doing anything else.
Hubs: I’m going to make dinner.
Me: *remains silent* Hmm, okay, you win.
Who knew conversations like that led to my husband making dinner! WRITERS EVERYWHERE, feel free to try it out on your spouse… it just might WORK!
A few days later…
Me: What if we actually turned into our cats?
Hubs: Two nights ago you were worried about our cats plotting to kill us. Now you’re thinking about being them so we want to kill ourselves?
Me: I never thought about it like that. If we were still ourselves though, in fur, we wouldn’t have to worry about it. (PS – Seriously you’ll think your cat has a plot to kill you after reading THIS).
Hubs: If you’re still you there’s no way in hell you’ll eat the cat food. We’d be screwed.
Me: You’re saying you’d eat it?
Hubs: I’d at least try it. If I’m a cat it wouldn’t be so bad I’d think.
Me: What would happen to our cats if they were still cats in human bodies?
Hubs: Why the hell do we have to do this now? The games on.
Me: I’m just worried they’d spend all day sleeping and my back would hurt even worse the next day. Or worse, they’d get stuck in a weird cat like position I couldn’t get out of when I change back.
Hubs: *watches game*
Silence enters the room. Both cats awake and staring at me (again, probably plotting to kill me).
Me: Well at least one thing is for sure. I DO NOT WANT TO BE MY CAT FOR A DAY. Sounds like too much work.
Hubs: This conversation is too much work.
Silence fills the room, AGAIN. I walk to the refrigerator, grab a carton of ice cream – and a spoon. Cats stare at me… I walk to cupboard pull out kitty treats, disperse appropriately… okay maybe I give them to many. After this conversation I don’t want to die. I value my life. And my husbands – even if tires of my conversations.