Tuesday, February 23, 2010

teaser tuesday

This isn't a long teaser, which I think is nice since some of us have several blogs to look at, but you can still enjoy it!!

I sat hidden behind the trees, still adjusting to where I ended up, confused and disorientated from what felt like I'd been sucked through a tight space. I find myself standing near two boys by the river, they jumped into the river, I wanted to join them but was nervous. I sat still for a few more minutes until I had gotten the courage to walk closer, the acreage was large, I saw a house a few miles away, I assumed the boys lived there since no other houses were around, I finally approached them "hi" I said... No one answered. "Hi" I said louder. Still no one answered. I suddenly felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, something wasn't right, I turn and see him walking towards them... Terrified I stand frozen. I want to warn them but they don't hear me. he doesn't even seem to notice me. He walks... The boys laughing and playing in the river. Why don't they hear him?Don't they feel the something is off. I shiver... Though it isn't cold. He continues to walk, and approaches one boy, they notice him. Fear captivates them, then I see a boy fall. He's been stabbed, the other boy stands over him... motionless

11 comments:

Christopher said...

Not what I was expecting at all! Ouch.

Crystal Cook said...

I didn't see that coming either, but you really had the suspense nailed, I started to get a little scared. But poor little boy:( I can say that as the mom of a little boy. Great work!

Summer said...

Okay, Jen! We need a bigger chunk! Need to know what's happening!!! ;-)

Tiffany Neal said...

I loved it! Totally surprised me. :)

Carolyn V. said...

Wow, that surprised me too!

Jenn Johansson said...

Poor little boys! Interesting premise. :)

Nicole Ducleroir said...

I can't decide if this is reality or dream...interesting!

robby (once upon a book blog/fourteen years) said...

I love this. I really, really love this.
Wonderful. :]

Southpaw said...

Yikes!

VR Barkowski said...

Intriguing. Is she a spirit or are the boys? Amazing tension.

When you have a second, stop by my page. I have something for you and your wonderful blog.

http://vrbarkowski.blogspot.com/

Lisa and Laura said...

Nicely done! I'm right there with your MC. What's next?